8 things I'm trying very hard to accept.

1. Your skins may never be perfect & that's okay.

2. Life is too short not have the car, the shoes, the clothes
& the hair colour you want.

3. Everyone (including your family, your coworkers & your best friend)
will talk about you behind your back & you'll talk about them too. It doesn't 
mean you don't love each other.

4. People are not medicine, people are able to walk away from you.

5. You can easily be forgotten.

6. It's okay to spend money on things that make you happy.

7. Sometimes without fault or reason, relationships deteriorate. It will
happen when you're six, it will happen when you're sixty. That's life.

8. Sometimes the people you love couldn't love you back.



Alexa for eyeko.

I'm not a big fan of eyeliners. I'm bad at applying & balancing.
With my droopy eyelids, applying eyeliner would give me a
smudgy effect after a little while. Fortunately with the new
Alexa Chung for Eyeko eyeliner, it gives me a reason to begin
applying eyeliner once more. It is suitable for those who
struggle most of the time. Plus, it'll stay perfectly in place even at
all times; even after you accidentally rub your eyes. Technically,
it is just the same as any marker you would use when writing
but this one is specifically for you to be creative on your eyes.
Made easy indeed.

Till then, stay gold!


When our world was in black & white everything seemed to be simple.

Oh hello there, I finally got myself a white Cheap Monday crinkle
PU roll over clutch bag/sling. I've been listening to Emphasize by
Sleeping at last. I don't feel like going out lately, I'm being such a 
grandma & I like it. 

For those who matter.
Whatever purifies you is the right path. I realised that you weren't the
one who wrecked me, ruined me or destroyed me. It was me because only 
I have the power to do that to myself. I destroyed myself by loving you.
I want to explain how exhausted I am, even in my dreams. How I wake
up tired, how I'm being frowned by some kind of black wave.

Till then, stay gold!


My favourite lush products!

One of my most favourite brand would be Lush.
Here is my most used products from Lush!

Body: My favorite lotion for moisture would be Karma Kream. I couldn't
get enough of the smell. A gentle hand & body cream to nourish skins &
perfume it with orange, patchouli & pine for a scent that lasts all day. It's loaded
with almond oil, cocoa butter & glycerine to leave skin supple & positively glowing.

Hair: For my hair, I'm using Roots for healthy & clean scalp. The root to great hair
starts at the scalp. Using mint in three different ways to stimulate the scalp & hair follicles.
Conditioning & strengthening extra virgin olive oil, honey & balancing nettle. My second
favourite hair product from Lush would be H'Suan Wen Hua. Full of protein, nourishing
ingredients to revive your hair & improve its condition. 

Face: Honestly, I love it all especially Ocean Salt.
Ocean salt it's a good curbs. Limes steeped in vodka, grapefruit & lashings of salt go 
into this invigorating face & body scrub now in a self preserving formula.

Till then, stay gold!


It's on my list.

2014 Summer inspiration.
(Photos from tumblr)


I photographed for F.timber

Well hello there, if you follow me on Twitter & Facebook you would 
know that I was working with F.timber. Such an amazing experience
& opportunities. F.timber is an established brand since 1995 & is exclusively
available in more than 50 departmental stores throughout Malaysia!

Make sure to checkout my photographs for F.timber at
Lot G58, Plaza Metro Kajang.

Till then, stay gold.


Live fast.

Proenza Schouler - Mini classic.

This Summer
Do something you would never think of doing. Go on that roller
coaster or that water slide; the one you've always been scare to go
on. Act crazy & not care what anyone thinks. Don't worry if you're
single or not, if you have a boyfriend then that's great. If you're single, what
are friends for. Stop worrying about what people say about you. This
Summer live each day like it's your last because before you know it,
it'll be over. Make this summer the best & live without regrets.


On Friday, I tasted life.

Friday, my second favourite F word!
After spending a week in Johor & Singapore, I'm able to to catch up 
with some rest. Sadness flies away on the wings of time. I've never seen
any life transformation that didn't begin with the person in question finally
getting tired of their own bullshit. However, nothing like tea in the morning 
& watching 'Friends' tv show after a good night sleep. I haven't added any 
records collection in a couple of months but if I'm planning to get any, 
I would go for Sam Smith, Lana Del Rey & Best coast. At the moment, 
I've been listening to 'Not in the way' by Sam Smith & I still couldn't get over it. 
It is one of my most played song on iTunes, 467 times to be exact. 

Till then, stay gold!


Summer playlist.

Hello there, thank you for being so patience with me. I've been busy
dreaming, I woke up to pursuit my dreams because dreams do come
true. Cheers! Summer is finally here & I want to share a few of my 
favourite Summer tracks. I use 8track personally to listen to music when
I'm traveling, so I thought I could curate a playlist to share with my readers.
Here's eighteen of my favourite tracks that I'm listening to this Summer.

Till then, stay gold!


Here are 20 ways to avoid toxic friends & enjoy true friendship.

This topic of friendship is such an important one to think about 
because when you enjoy greater friendships, you truly enjoy a happier life. 
Friends should bring you joy, love & laughter. Not stress, drama & anxiety.

1. Surround yourself with cheerleaders, not fear leaders!
True friends motivate & support you. They let you know they believe in you.

2. Love this who will love you when you have nothing to offer but your own company.

3. Appreciate those who are happy for your happiness & sad for your sadness.
These are people to truly treasure.

4. Value those who are there for you, no matter what! True friends have been with
you through the worst & still think you're the best. If you want to find out who your
true friends are, screw up & then see who's still around.

5. True friends "get you" at a soul level then make your soul feel happily caffeinated.

6. True friends make you feel safe to think out loud in front of them.

7. Value friends who speak truthfully to you & are up for engaging in "courageous
dialogues" about what's on their mind & their heart. There's a famous expression:
"A friend is someone who stabs in the front". In other words: Honestly is better than
sugar coated bullshit.

8.Words are who someone wants to be, actions are who they truly are.

9. Everything in this universe is energy. Trust the energy you feel around a person.
This energy lets you know a lot of information about them, listen up!

10. Together, you assorted friends should be varied & well rounded with an emphasis
on quality not quantity. You don't need certain amount of friends. You just need friends
you can be certain about.

11. Keep in mind Jim Rohn's belief that eventually you become the merging of the 5 people
you spend the most time hangout with. Choose your top 5 friends wisely.

12. You can't change the people around you but you can change the people you choose
to be around.

13. Everyone hears what you say, friends listen to what you say. Truly good friends
listen to what you don't say.

14. Keep in mind that none of us are perfect. We all make mistakes. What's essential is
surrounding yourself with people who value learning & growing. A John Green said:
"I don't know any perfect people. Just really, really flawed people who are still worth loving."

15. While it's good to give people who mess up a chance to make things right, remember it
should be more like 3 strikes & you're out. Not 976321 strikes & you're out! At a certain point
it's essential/self-loving to move on. You have to ignore people who do crappy things to you.
You got to forget about people who have forgotten about you. Basically, stop stressing about
people who don't deserve room in your heart. Do what you can to let go & forgive them.
All of your them's! The more them's you can forgive, the better you'll feel. Yes, it's very 
possible & very okay to forgive someone & still not want to spend time with them.

16. No friendship or relationship is ever a waste of time. If if doesn't give you what you 
want or need, it reminds you of what you don't want or don't need.

17. Do no harm, but take no shit.

18. Kind people are the best kinda people. Seek kind people, be kind people. Become aware
of how you make people feel when they're around you. Focus in bringing people peace, love,
support & inspiration.

19. Let the friends you love know it. Say it in your own way, you'll brighten their day & grow
how close you feel. Life is short, love largely.

20. Keep in mind that it took you years to learn how to love yourself. If they don't like you,
you don't have to waste that kind of time to convince someone else to love or stay with you.

Till then, stay gold!


Things I will tell my daughter.

1. Second chances are for those who will chase hell blind
for your last name. Who plant their feet between the walls of your
esophagus to keep from closing in on days you find it hard to breathe
out pretty things. Who will crawl into bed to hold you.

2. The problem with being poor is that we never have the 
upper-hand in love. Our hearts become tied to our worth & offer 
it like common apologies. Pace yourself, darling. A smile is enough 
for now. The right man will knock on your bolted doors bearing 
gifts & ask for your heart, as if it were the only thing that could 
quench his soul’s thirst.

3. Heartbreak is inevitable. Daughter, take precaution, but detour 
signs still lead to your heart. When it hits, it’ll hit hard. Months from 
then you’ll still be reeling from the knockout. Never quite sure if 
you’re healing or numbing. But I swear there will come a day where 
you will learn to laugh again. I will show you how.

4. Who told you, you are too much? Or too less? 
Look at the sun, will you yell at it for burning too high? Will you blame 
the moon for being too small? Let me tell you this, I did not know 
beauty wore my face till the first time I held you. Your soft lashes 
fluttering with every explosion happening a million light years away.

5. Days you don’t feel like brushing your hair, go out in rain boots 
even on sunny days. They will make you feel like an adventurer. 
Go treasure hunting in thrift shops & second hand bookstores. 
You will feel light, oh so light. 

6. Color rose petals between the spaces of your spine. 
Plant seeds of self worth for your tears to nurture. Give yourself things 
you need that men can not. 

7. The world is not always kind. You will learn to strike with 
quick succession, to cut throats. Do not fold your body in ways it 
was never meant to be tucked. Do not become a door mat for others to 
wipe the dirt from their feet off on. 

8. You do not always have to be ladylike. Your perfectly lined lips
 weren’t meant to wrap themselves around mirrored truths. 
Or to pleasure boys with. But rather for enunciating your name.

Till then, stay gold!


How to Overcome Emotional Numbness.

Emotional numbness is where we experience mild to severe feelings of detachment. So it’s hard for us to access normal feelings any more. This includes both negative & positive emotions as you can’t decide to shut just one feeling off. Common causes of emotional numbness include different stresses or traumas from receiving bad new to being in an accident to recovering from the death of someone close to a relationship breakup to feeling deeply humiliated or ashamed. So how do you overcome emotional numbness and live with emotional integrity again?
1. The first thing to do is to choose to respect & allow all emotions. No matter what they are. Also, try & grasp the fact that suppressing your emotions will likely lead to heartache & problems later on (as they’ll possibly resurface at inappropriate times.)
2. Try & understand that feelings and actions are two very different, & unrelated, things.  That is, you can still feel angry without becoming violent so don’t assume your feelings will affect your actions.
3. Try to figure out the message behind intense emotions. Are you angry because you’ve been hurt, used or abused? Are you sad because deep down you feel that you’ll never find true love. As you can’t believe that anyone will love you for yourself?
4. Take that risk & find the courage to ask someone for help. If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll know that there are those who genuinely love you like a true & caring friend. The important thing is not to try & isolate yourself. Make the extra effort to prioritise self-care. You need other people to help you work through this.
5. Seek professional help if the symptoms persist. There are excellent counsellors & therapists out there who have the training & skills to help you to get free. You can live a more fulfilling & normal, healthy life.
6. Be patient within yourself. It’s likely to take time as you will need to learn to trust & take some barriers down, so you can be yourself again (and that is often hard to do when you’ve experience hurt & pain). 


Workspace tour & great news.

Hello there, miss me yet? I've been so busy that I've neglected my blog.
I fell sick more often lately, god knows why. However, I'm ready to
give out more details on my workspace. As some of you know, I have
a mini studio for personal work use. (applause) Feast your eyes!

Besides that, I have a great news. Remember when I photographed for 
F.Timber & Nichi's handbags? look out for F.Timber & Nichi's ads
on the newspaper photographed by me. I'm not so sure when but I'll 
definitely update you on what newspapers & date.

Til then, stay gold!


Practical advice for difficult women.


It is always awkward when someone asks me for relationship advices.
Obviously I'm shit at relationship & I'm not afraid to admit it. There's
so many difficult women out there & I'm one of them. 

1) There will come a time when you want to cut off all your hair, do it.
Realise that the thing you want to get rid of doesn't lie in the long curls
that frames your face so perfectly. Live with short hair for a while. It will
still grow, just like life. It goes on.

2) You won't always want to talk to people. That's okay, when it's late &
you hear your friends or see your friends talking online, you don't have to
join them. You're allowed to isolate yourself, sometimes it's just sweeter &
it teaches you how to survive alone. You will need that skill.

3) At times, you will believe that nothing will ever grow again. You're
wrong. Every year, London looks like it's on its last legs, wheezing through
those cold days in March. Every year, spring comes like an explosion & the 
city shakes off its sleep.

4) Mundane problems will get the better of you sometimes, don't worry. Try
as you might, life can't be an endless, beautiful, intense moment. Find comfort 
in money worries & late trains; they're welcome rest in between heartbreaks &

5) People will call you a cynic, a wry smile on their faces. Pay them no mind.
You alone know that you are capable of a love greater than anything they can
comprehend. You alone know that you are not willing to sell your identity &
respect to the first smirking halfwit to pass by. It is not cynicism, it is reverence
for your own vast & fathomless heart. It makes sense only to love someone
who understands that & is awed by it.

6) You will not always get what you want or who you want, accept it. Your goals
are not set in stone & you are not on a fixed trajectory. Sometimes, life will take
its time & you will have to play the long, interminable game. Play it well & with
as much grace you can muster. Love at your own pace.

7) At night, you will occasionally wake up afraid, wanting to die. Having a great
fear of being alone & having a desperate need for solitude. That's always been a
tug of war for me. Don't give in, night plays its tricks, but you are not so easily
fooled. Your mind will play its tricks, it will make you believe that you're not who
you are, you are not good enough to be loved & you must not give in. You take
a breath & you tell yourself that you are here, that you always were.

8) Don't rush into a relationships, it will never end well. Unless, you are the 
exception. If a guy wants you, he will make it happen. Love isn't a game, you
are not an option. If your crush doesn't love for you for who you are, they are at
lost. Remember that you are difficult because you are fragile, you've seen enough
romance goes down the hill & die under the deep sea. You care & that's beautiful.

9) If you are in a relationship, stop worrying about your men. If your men
loves you, he will make everything happen for you. You are the only one.
Most people worry about being not enough, ended up not being enough because
their start to believe that the other half is good not enough & the relationship is
good not enough. 

10) Lower down your expectations when it comes to all men. They are suppose
to surprise you with their effort. When you expect too much, you are only going 
to be disappointed. This will trigger all arguments, men doesn't like argument
 especially when it happens all the time. Remember that men are bad at sugar 
coating words, they are bad at saying sorry or saying what's on their mind.
That makes them a man, that is what makes them a male. That doesn't mean
they don't care or love you. Stop doubting them trust your relationship.

11) Stop comparing yourself, you are unique & beautiful in your own way.
You shouldn't be compared with others; you makes you, you. If someone can love
you through your skin, that is love. Cherish that!

Till then, stay gold! 


Come, let us have some tea.

Kusmi Tea would be one of my favourite tea. The company, which
produces Russian style tea & tea blends was established by Pavel
Michailovitch Kousmichoff (1840-1908)

How to have a lovely day.

First of all, I'm madly in love with my Cath Kidston mugs. I don't think 
I can start my day without a cup of good tea or coffee. A good tea or coffee
is good for your soul. I like to take a long nice shower & wear something that 
makes me feel good. When I don't feel like leaving the house, I would watch
a really good movie. I would What's app or tweet someone, hinting them that
they are on my mind. I smile a lot, I read poems or books & get really into it.
Candles are a must, I will never fail to light a nice smelling candle. Environment 
is very important to me, I need my space to be sorted out. I could sit for ten
minutes in silence & stare at my studio or bedroom. Its good for your mental
health. Never ever underestimate music, listen to a good song that fits for the
weather or mood. Music could change your day, music helps me. I would eat
 dessert first, grab my spoon & eat yummy red velvet ice cream. Have a chat 
with your pet, they are your best companion. I talk to my cats & dogs all the 
time. (loner alert) If I feel lonely, I hug my family or my favourite pillow.
Realise that whatever problem I have is only temporary. I would watch 
something that makes me laugh & try to forget whatever is bothering me.

Until then, stay gold!


How to talk to cats.

Teaching your cat simple commands like "Down!" & "NO!" will make
him or her a better pet, while words like "Treats!" & "Dinner!" will help
them associate you with something pleasurable. Cats rarely vocalize with
other cats. They reserve verbal interaction with humans. Feline language 
is a complex mix of facial expression, tail position, ear position & other
forms of body language in addition to scent & sound. Cat learn to make
demands of us by observing which of their sounds cause which human
responses. As for me, I speak to my cats everyday. To prove the theory
above, I did my own little research with my friend's cat. Meet Lion
 (pictures above) my friend wants to marry her female cat with my male cat.
It took her about 2-3 days to adapt the change of environment. To make
her feels like home, I would have to understand her needs.

Understanding your cat.
Some cats are vocal & have extensive vocabularies. Other cats scarily
speak at all or have a one size fits all meow that covers all the bases.

Vocalizations which are fairly common to most cats.

1) Short meow: "Hey, how are you doing"

2) Multiple meows: " I'm so happy to see you, where've you been?"

3) Mid pitch meow: A plea for something, usually dinner or treats.

4) Drawn out meow: "I'm upset, I'm hungry you idiot!"

5) Low pitched meow: "You're so lame, your service sucks" (complaints)

6) High pitch meow: " I'm freaking angry you stupid human"

7) Purr: "I like you, I feel good & safe"

8) Hiss: "Steer clear. I'm pissed & I'm not afraid to draw blood"

Most cats use the following gesture to communicate.

1) Tail straight up or with a curl at the end: Happy.

2) Tail twitching: Excited or anxious.

3) Tail vibrating: Very excited to see you.

4) Tail fur sticks straight up while the tail curls in shape of an N: Aggression.

5) Tail fur sticks straight up but the tail is held low: Aggression or frightened.

6) Tail held low & tucked under the rear: Frightened. 

7) Dilated pupils: Very playful or excited. It can also indicate aggression.

8) Slowly blinking eyes: Affection, the equivalent of blowing a kiss.

9) Ears pinned back: Fear, anxiety or aggression.

10) Tongue flicking: Worry.

11) Rubbing head, flank & tails against a person or animal: Greeting.

12) Head butting: Friendliness & affection.

13) Face sniffing: Confirming identity.

14) Wet nose kiss: Kissing.

15) Licking: Affection, your cats are comfy with you.

Last but not least, here's a few tips to steal your cats heart. Always be the one who
serve your cats food or treats. Play with your cats ear or nose. Believe me that 
you & your cats are closer than ever.

Till then, stay gold.


Single awareness day.

Hello there, most of you know that Valentine's day is around the corner.
Decorations, tweets & tumblr post can be really annoying. There's no 
escaping & I know some of you out there are dating Pizzas. Just because
you are single doesn't mean you should abandon yourself, love yourself.
As for me, I'm treating myself with Laduree. Nothing can go wrong!
Yes, treat yourself! You deserve to be loved. How to treat yourself?

1. Make sure you own a nice bed.

2. Stay in bed, remember how nice it feels to flip over your pillow
to the cooler side.

3. Check your pulse & hum along to the rhythm because it is music.

4. Go out with your girlfriends. Shop, drink coffee or go dancing.

5. If you can, do not shut people out. You will have good days & they
should see them.

6. If your girlfriends are all busy with their dates & you feel overwhelmed;
scream. Have your own little adventure, take a walk, take a drive. 
Go out & see the little things.

7. Have a nice bubble bath, paint your nails & what ever makes you feel
beautiful. Dress up, put on make up & smile. Do it for yourself.

8. Have a movie or tv series marathon, there's so many tv shows to catch up 
& discover.

9. Treat yourself with something sweet. Macaroons, ice cream & so on.

Till then, stay gold!


If you keep your option open, there are places you could go.

January 23th before Lunar new year, I was away for a little while with
my friends on a road trip to Malacca. Trust me when I say that I wanted 
to blog more details but I was having so much fun that it is ridiculous
to be handling camera all the time to document everything that we do. 
I had so much fun that I couldn't thank my friends enough for inviting.
However, I'm still sharing a few bits of Malacca town above with you.

Till then, stay gold.